Weight Right Here

Perhaps the most annoying thing about my jury duty yesterday was having to deal with security. Yes, you can xray my backpack, I'll take off my watch, turn off my phone and hand you my coat. Oh, you wanted my belt, too? Now that's a problem. You see, I've lost about 18 pounds on my diet and since I hope to lose another 18 pounds, I've thought "why should I buy new clothes simply to have to turn around and buy yet more clothes?"

The answer occurred to me right about the time my belt buckle got into a spat with the metal detector. I found myself standing there trying to maintain my dignity while holding up my pants lest they fall to my ankles in front of a crowd of strangers.
... holding up my pants lest they fall to my ankles in front of a crowd of strangers.

Well, at least they'd appreciate how svelte you look. Congrats on O minus 18, and best of luck on reaching O minus 36!
Now, here's an interesting question -- what about that pesky little third amendment? You know, the one that protects you from searches but upon probable cause? In most cases, they get around it by saying that you are there at your own option. That's quite simply not true if you've been called for jury duty -- you are there through no choice of your own.
Too bad the Third Amendment isn't the one you mean. It's the "unknown amendment" which protects us from the government quartering soldiers in our pants ... er ... homes :)

It's the Fourth Amendment that you're wondering about. Basically, the Supreme court has ruled that such searches do not violate this Amendment so long as they are conducted for routine, non-investigative purposes. You can read a bit more about this at FindLaw, if you like.
That's ridiculous. Don't you feel safe now?

I once had my bag searched at the airport before Homeland Security was a national buzzword. They pulled out my shiny new blue ribbed vibrator. That was interesting.
Aww.. i hate it when that happens . shut it *slap* i wish my pants were falling off cause i lost weight!>:P
Yeah...I find that "security" can be used as a sad excuse to humiliate someone for no reason. When I was catching a flight to Boston last April the PDX security in the airport had to wand me because I set off the metal detector, (the 2G hoops in my ears probably did'nt help) well when the guy was "wanding" me it kept buzzing around my upper instead of asking me to go to behind one of the privacy barriers w/a female guard I had to lift my skirt therefore exposing my garders to about 100 people. The metal clasps were the culprit. Some eyebrows were raised and my dignity was somewhere on the floor.

yeah...I felt REAL "secure" that day.

I haven't seen you or I am sure I would've noticed. ;)

I'm workin on that myself.