Hollywood Hell

After a long, painful day at work, I've come to the conclusion that I hate Hollywood. Oh, I love the movies, I love my job, and I admit that I have come to love hearing some of the gossip, but Hollywood itself is this vicious, foul, narcissistic beast that whose spawn delight in nothing more than tossing money in mud puddles to see who will wallow for it.

One executive has an assistant whose job is to follow the executive around and hand him sweets whenever he wants some. Yet another has claimed that charging a Palm Pilot is too difficult, so one person has the responsibility of maintaining backup Palm Pilots fully charged at all times and swapping them out before the battery on the "active" one dies. This executive recently went on a vacation and was furious when his battery died. Many studios provide their executives with rubber phones that won't break when thrown. You can imagine how understanding these people are when we explain that having advance notice of new features is helpful.

And those are the stories I can tell which don't violate my non-disclosure agreement.
But if you had to have an assistant to only perform some trivial task for you that you hate doing, what would that person's job description be?

I would like an assistant to cut my toenails, personally.
NDAs ruin the very best tales. So annoying. One day I want to have a big NDA-breaking party in which we all throw snippets of really good stories into a jar and combine them all into a fanciful saga of nothingness.
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I work for Rentrak Corporation. The team that I work on basically gets the sales data from theaters across the US, Canada, Guam and some others and tells the studios how much money they've made.
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How long I've been a programmer is a tough question. I started programming back in the early 80s while I was in high school. However, things in my life conspired to pull me away and I only returned to programming about six or seven years ago. I'm very, very happy that I did.
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nice. I have only been at it about 3 years now. I'm just now geting PHP Down. Mostly worked in Perl and C++. What do you use.
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I specialize in Perl, but I've done programming in a number of other languages. Most of the stuff that I regularly work with is Perl, SQL and JavaScript. I also do a bit of work embedding C in Perl, but my C is a bit weak.

I also play around with Java and Prolog and have been playing with Scheme, but there's just so much to learn and so little time :)
OH my god! If I could have an assistant that would keep backup PDAs charged for when my battery runs out I would be one happy woman!!!!
I have to say, I really enjoy reading your posts as it is, but this is just awesome. It makes me wonder what it is you do for a living these days.
I'm a programmer. I tend to specialize in large-scale database driven Web sites, though I wear a lot of different hats.