November 10th, 2004

atkins

Weight Right Here

Perhaps the most annoying thing about my jury duty yesterday was having to deal with security. Yes, you can xray my backpack, I'll take off my watch, turn off my phone and hand you my coat. Oh, you wanted my belt, too? Now that's a problem. You see, I've lost about 18 pounds on my diet and since I hope to lose another 18 pounds, I've thought "why should I buy new clothes simply to have to turn around and buy yet more clothes?"

The answer occurred to me right about the time my belt buckle got into a spat with the metal detector. I found myself standing there trying to maintain my dignity while holding up my pants lest they fall to my ankles in front of a crowd of strangers.
Space Station

Hi There. I'm In Third Grade!

Pardon me while I have an extremely juvenile moment (well, most of my moments are juvenile, so you needn't point this out.)

Space.com has an article entitled New Images Reveal Clouds on Planet Uranus. Of course, no other planet needs the word "planet" to introduce it. This was merely an attempt to fend off the rather juvenile, but tiresome jokes about the planet's name. In fact, these jokes are sold stale that even I am tired of them. Imagine that.

The jokes are still there, though, because of their most unfortunate choice of tailing paragraph:

"There is very little temperature contrast and very little energy to drive the weather in Uranus," says Sromovsky. "Whatever is happening has to be well lubricated; it has to be a low-friction environment."

Um, right.

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